Your submitted evaluation:
My reading prompted the following questions about the script:
Overall, the playwright should revise with an eye to specific detail, OR revise with the intention of making the play more surreal or fantastic. All of the settings are vague, and vague usually kills dramatic interest unless the whole structure is surreal or fantastic. I would also advise that the writer attempt to make the conclusion specific...the MAYBES won't work. Themes seem to be : religious bigotry- presumably of the Protestant or Fundamentalist Christian type; Pronouns and sexuality- this is once again somewhat vague...suggested and not explicit; and generational...this is the most successful, although taste in music is overused. I find Mary to be sympathetic, but what is the nature of her grief? What happens to her?
Danny is another mystery. The playwright should revise with an eye to making Danny's appearances explicable to and with the characters he interacts with. Are his appearances all flashbacks, or is he sometimes a ghost?
The apparent antagonism between Winnie and Zabby needs to be more clearly and specifically motivated. Why do they react to each other as they do?
How do you break a ring? How does an audience see it?
Two quibbles: p. 64 "Mary has said TOO much." p. 49 change SAT to SITTING
Your rating: 1
Evaluation submitted: 2024-05-05 21:31:54
